In full disclosure, the video below is excerpted from a pornographic motion picture. The twitching bits and dangling parts that would normally be considered offensive in a video of this nature have been edited and excised… leaving only horror.
While part of a pornographic film, the video can only be considered “erotic” in the way that Cthulhu can be considered a fish. The only erection you will seek after seeing this film will be a load-bearing structure over which you can throw a sturdy noose.
The video is technically safe for work, but only similarly to the fashion in which detailed planning to immolate your manager is “safe for work”: it’s best to not be caught. I would view this video at your office only if you find employment disagreeable. I would view it at home only if you wish to make a personal contribution to a general reduction in population density. And I would view it in public only if you are a sociology student interested in the dynamics of crowd hysterics.
Once viewed, it cannot be unseen. It does for the act of sexual relations what Yog-Sothoth does for geometry. If The Colour Out of Space drove men mad, this should be considered plaid.
Yes, my descriptions are Lovecraftian in nature, precisely because it is most apt: had Lovecraft been able to view this video, he would have spent the remainder of his days decrying himself as a useless hack, and what stories he did deem publishable would be about Abdul Alhazred, the gonzo Arab pornographer.
You should not watch this video.
(via Topless Robot, who I will make pay for their crimes)
[tags]E.T. The Extra Terrestrial, The Extra Testicle, 80’s porn, dark humor, satire[/tags]
oh god. ET looks so sad and patient… it’s like watching a mother theresa rape video.